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Affirming ME, Diminishing ED. New book and story of recovery! Emily Shares Her Story.
01.05.12
Emily Estes shares her recovery journey and details of her new book: Affirming ME, Diminishing ED:
Lao Tzu spoke words that, for me, explain so much of what has occurred in the process of recovery. It goes like this, “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” I realized that in the past ten years of struggling with bulimia, I never allowed myself to be vulnerable to love; I felt unworthy of receiving love and incapable of showing love to others. Recovery, in the end, was not about following a meal plan to perfection or never engaging in behaviors; rather, recovery got down to the simple fact that I felt hopeless, insecure, unworthy, and a whole host of varying negativity. It was when I turned to the words of Mildred McAfee, “If you have great ambition, take as big as step as possible in the direction of fulfilling it. The step may only be a tiny one, but trust that it may be the largest one possible for now,” that I truly began the journey to recovery. With my greatest ambition being a life of recovery, I set out on a journey that took me forward and backward many times. A few magazines and a spare notebook opened my eyes to a world I’d not seen in a long time by providing me the strength to see beyond the negative, the ability to embrace the positive, and ultimately realize that this journey is neither flawless nor effortless. It was through this process that I put together a binder full of pages, ultimately leading to my recent publication of Affirming ME, diminishing ed, an affirmation book holding the message of hope I saw as I brought page after page together. No page bears perfection. No message holds the simple answer we search for again and again. It was the process of bringing these pages together though that allowed me to let go of the desire for perfection and instead, seek freedom! A freedom that allowed me to discover the courage that was deep within!
Recovery is not a destination. It is a process full of ups and downs. For me, it was about not only allowing myself to be loved by others, but also being vulnerable to loving others in return. This life, I learned, is about more than food, expectations, and quite bluntly… me. Life offers us an opportunity to love others, to make a difference in the lives we come in contact with. I want my legacy to be more than a girl with an eating disorder who’s isolated, hopeless, and full of shame. NO! I want a legacy that will show who I am beyond ed and an outside image of what others assume. I will choose to allow happiness and love into my life; to fill the depths of my soul! I will be the individual God has chosen me to be and travel the road He has chosen!
About Affirming Me, Diminishing ED, Emily’s new book: Through the use of collage and inspiration, Emily has brought together a message of hope to those struggling with eating disorders and a life of addiction. She seeks to share the message that recovery IS possible! Emily welcomes you to join her in affirming YOU and diminishing ed! To learn more, visit www.affirmingmediminishinged.weebly.com
Celebrating the New Year
01.03.12
Happy New Year!
It is that time of year again, the beginning of a new year when everything feels fresh and new. It is always a great time of year to take stock of where you have been and where you are headed. However, for many the New Year this “taking stock” is synonymous with resolutions to lose weight and diet. It doesn’t help that we often become bombarded with messages enforcing the idea of health, happiness, and new beginnings as associated with health and new beginnings.
I encourage you to resist these messages (as difficult as this may be!) and resolve to begin a new year that feels authentic to you–not your body or your appearance–but the person you are. Try to develop resolutions that will enhance your life through your developing the person rather than the physical being you are.
I look forward to celebrating the New Year with you and look forward to updating you on many new developments through Mindfullness.
Nurturing Our Mind and Body
12.21.11
During this busy holiday season it is very easy to get lost in all the associated hustle and bustle! Shopping for gifts, attending holiday parties, and maintaining commitments to friends and family members–sound familiar?
What is supposed to be a joyous time of year can easily become stressful and fraught with tension. Often we find ourselves caught in the middle of many competing demands and trying to please everyone around us. For those struggling with an eating disorder or food difficulties this dynamic mimics areas that may already be ongoing struggles.
So, how do we learn to say no, navigate this stress and find a way to enjoy the holidays? This process begins with connecting with ourselves.
After all, eating disorders breed on disconnection. When we become separated from ourselves, our wants, needs and desires we become lost. Often we don’t know how to meet the needs we have and we turn to food as way of filling in the gap or numbing ourselves from emotional discomfort. Catching this tendency is key to preventing emotional imbalance and the subsequent symptoms that follow.
Here are some easy questions you can ask yourself that will help you maintain connection or re-connection daily (or at least to get you through the holiday season!)
* How am I feeling today?
* Where may this feeling be coming from?
* How can I make myself (or the situation) better?
* What do I need?
Remember, you can always say no as well!
Enjoy and Warm Holiday Wishes!
Navigating the Holidays
12.02.11
It is holiday time again! Along with the opportunity to celebrate with family and friends often comes increased stress and limited time. For people managing recovery from an eating disorder the holidays can bring increased stress and pressure. Here are some tips to navigate holiday eating and maintain recovery.
* Establish and maintain your support system. Let friend and family members know when you may feel triggered.
* Maintain a routine. Keep established meal times and follow your meal plan even when faced with new foods or different schedules.
* Despite an increase in time commitments maintain appointments with your treatment team.
* Bring a food item you feel comfortable with when attending an event. This way you will know there is something there you will eat, and it will minimize feelings of anxiety.
* Allow time for relaxation. Do things that feel comforting and soothing to you. If you don’t want to attend an event or something does not feel right, honor that urge for yourself. You are not obligated to do it all and be everything for everyone!